As we raided the kitchen last night, Susie said the sweetest thing to me. Anna and I were stuffing ourselves with peanut butter and she said, "I love how you talk about Jesus like you know him."
I said, "H-e-l-l-o. I do. We were married in 2011."
It may sound strange to the unbeliever and it may even sound strange to some who believe, but Father, you and I know that I am yours. I gave my heart to you in the fall of 2011. It was a season of my life where I asked you to help me to learn how to be single.
Having had relationships for most of my life, I was finding it difficult to be in the presence of self and not wonder about my "next relationship, if I should date and who should I date....." The thoughts were twirling around in my head, I was in a new town and a new church and you were in the process of exchanging my plans for yours. I was trying to surrender to you but it was a very blue season for me.
I used to be a "blue baby." I was one of those people that felt alone and isolated in the colder months and free and spontaneous in the warmer months. I was feeling lonely and wondering why you had me in a place of solitude.
My Lord, you spoke to me in many ways and all of the things that you were asking of me back then was directly what my soul needed, what my spirit needed and what my heart had longed for.
I could hear you say things like, "Denise, can you please spend some time with me?"
And then, when Alice gifted me with that book, you know the one that forever changed my relationship with you....yes, His Princess Bride-Love Letters From Your Prince. That book sealed my love for you and completely convinced me that [our wedding vows] were the real deal. When you said, "I love you." My heart believed it and at that moment, I was yours.
I am feeling such an overwhelming amount of love from you and I cannot put it into words. I cannot attempt to explain it to someone who is not feeling lavished by your love and truthfully speaking, it is still difficult for me to grasp.
Just yesterday, while driving home and just shortly after finding that "penny" on the ground, I was asking you why is it that I get it? Why do I get how powerful your love is and how your promises are true and how you only want the best for me? And not only that, I read something very profound by Beth Moore. She said that you could not love me any more than you already do. I bask in that thought. I'm greatly loved by you and nothing and no one can ever change that.
I've never experienced a relationship such as this and I trust you with my heart, my future and my life. It all belongs to you and who better to care for me than the one who knows me and the one who created me?
Prayers: Thea, LS, Nancy, Anna, Susie, Melanie, Kara, Donna, Laurie and James as they are still traveling, LB and family, Bernice, Sierra, my big sister and my little sister as you continue to find a cure for Lupus and continued health care and protection for my mom.
PRAISE! YOU are so working it #all out for the upcoming Grace Brethren Women's Retreat! I'm so, so ready to get my #blessing! So, so ready to sit at your feet and so, so ready to give you honor and glory! Thank you for blessing Bernice, Donnell and his family!
PS- Thank you for that "laugh out loud" moment with Marty. It was priceless! I love what you're doing in her life! Keep it up. Lol
Eternally yours
